My life has changed so sudden. I never thought this would happen to me. I was 24 weeks when I found out my cervix was dilated at three and was rushed to Rockford Memorial Hospital. In hours, I was told if I had the twins their chance of survival was very low and then all the emotions came upon me. Why this have to happen to me? How come my doctor didn’t catch any of this? They knew I was high risk!! They knew I had extra fluid build up in both sacs. Why just send me on my way like everything was normal? Boy, was I angry. Not just at myself, but at my local hospital. I played the blame game and I cried. Cried cos it wasn’t fair. I was able to hold off labor and one week later I had the boys at 25 weeks one day! Labor just came all of a sudden. Never been so scared in my life, but my boys were born and sent away to the N.I.C.U. I heard that the N.I.C.U was one of the best in the area, I heard many stories of other micro-preemies making it so I had hope and faith.
The boys were born on 3/24/13 and 3/25/13 just ten minutes apart. They both weighed 1 pound 12 oz. The boys made it. Nathan my youngest twin came out the weakest of the two. His lungs are less developed than his brothers. It has been three weeks since they were born and it has been a roller coaster ride for sure. The most overwhelming scary thing I ever been through. All the monitors and alarms going off just makes me feel so helpless. I’m suppose to be their mom and make them feel better and I can’t; all I can do is sit, touch and talk to my boys. That’s the only way right now. To be strong and have faith!
Speaking of my roller coaster ride, this past week has been the most hardest for me. I saw how bad my boys can fight. My oldest son Noah, had to go in for a P.D.A. surgery. It’s where they tie the duct in the heart, since it never closed at birth. I sat there by my boys bedside praying and just talking, knowing he needs this surgery done! It will help his lungs out in the near future. Finally, the doctors came in and told me all the risks of surgery. I didn’t want to hear those negatives, but I took a deep breath and carried on. They told us it would be normal if for the next 48 hours after surgery my boy goes back up on his oxygen and his stats go up and down and he ends up on the oscillator. My boy went into surgery and it was the longest two hours I ever experienced, but he did well and surgery went smoothly. What a relief off my soldiers until the next day both of his lungs collapsed and he was put on the oscillator! My heart sunk, he was doing so well before surgery. As the day went on, the doctors would take x-rays of his little body and he pulled through; his lungs weren’t collapsed anymore, but as of today he is still on the oscillator recovering at his own pace.Noah, now way 2 lbs 5 oz which is wonderful news to me because even though he was born at 1 pound 12 oz he lost weight and was 1 pound 5 oz a few days after he was born. He tolerates his feedings and he’s up to 13 ML every 3 hours. Nathan, on the other hand is sicker than his brother, but he is a fighter. He has pulmonary hypertension and pulmonary emphysema due to his lungs being so underdeveloped. We have had two close calls, thinking he wasn’t going to make it, but we didn’t give up. He hasn’t given up and he’s still here. Oh, he also had a P.D.A. Nathan has been on nitrate for two weeks and we were told he wouldn’t be able to get his P.D.A. closed until he’s off the nitrate,but his lungs are so underdeveloped the doctors decided to call me at 10:00 Tuesday morning and tells me he’s going into emergency surgery for the P.D.A.even with being on the nitrate. There’s no other choice, they really can’t move forward. If it can help him, it needs to be done. Once again, my emotions take over me! He’s sicker than Noah. I know the risks are more higher for him with all his lung problems. We leave home and drive 45 minutes to the hospital. Yes, we live that far from Rockford and I hate leaving the boys when I have too. We get to the hospital and I see them preparing him for surgery. I haven’t cried yet, I was doing great, till the doctor walked in and told me to prepare, his lungs are so underdeveloped he may not be able to take the surgery. Right then and their I lost it! I had to be strong for my boy,but the tears kept flowing. He needed the surgery,cos nothing was changing for him. I couldn’t watch them take him to surgery so I sat in the waiting room for two hours and waited until the surgeon came in. He told me, he made it but it was trickier this time. He told me that his lungs re so underdeveloped he doesn’t even know if the surgery will help him. My boys made it! I see how strong my boys are. They are fighters!
The boys were born on 3/24/13 and 3/25/13 just ten minutes apart. They both weighed 1 pound 12 oz. The boys made it. Nathan my youngest twin came out the weakest of the two. His lungs are less developed than his brothers. It has been three weeks since they were born and it has been a roller coaster ride for sure. The most overwhelming scary thing I ever been through. All the monitors and alarms going off just makes me feel so helpless. I’m suppose to be their mom and make them feel better and I can’t; all I can do is sit, touch and talk to my boys. That’s the only way right now. To be strong and have faith!
Speaking of my roller coaster ride, this past week has been the most hardest for me. I saw how bad my boys can fight. My oldest son Noah, had to go in for a P.D.A. surgery. It’s where they tie the duct in the heart, since it never closed at birth. I sat there by my boys bedside praying and just talking, knowing he needs this surgery done! It will help his lungs out in the near future. Finally, the doctors came in and told me all the risks of surgery. I didn’t want to hear those negatives, but I took a deep breath and carried on. They told us it would be normal if for the next 48 hours after surgery my boy goes back up on his oxygen and his stats go up and down and he ends up on the oscillator. My boy went into surgery and it was the longest two hours I ever experienced, but he did well and surgery went smoothly. What a relief off my soldiers until the next day both of his lungs collapsed and he was put on the oscillator! My heart sunk, he was doing so well before surgery. As the day went on, the doctors would take x-rays of his little body and he pulled through; his lungs weren’t collapsed anymore, but as of today he is still on the oscillator recovering at his own pace.Noah, now way 2 lbs 5 oz which is wonderful news to me because even though he was born at 1 pound 12 oz he lost weight and was 1 pound 5 oz a few days after he was born. He tolerates his feedings and he’s up to 13 ML every 3 hours. Nathan, on the other hand is sicker than his brother, but he is a fighter. He has pulmonary hypertension and pulmonary emphysema due to his lungs being so underdeveloped. We have had two close calls, thinking he wasn’t going to make it, but we didn’t give up. He hasn’t given up and he’s still here. Oh, he also had a P.D.A. Nathan has been on nitrate for two weeks and we were told he wouldn’t be able to get his P.D.A. closed until he’s off the nitrate,but his lungs are so underdeveloped the doctors decided to call me at 10:00 Tuesday morning and tells me he’s going into emergency surgery for the P.D.A.even with being on the nitrate. There’s no other choice, they really can’t move forward. If it can help him, it needs to be done. Once again, my emotions take over me! He’s sicker than Noah. I know the risks are more higher for him with all his lung problems. We leave home and drive 45 minutes to the hospital. Yes, we live that far from Rockford and I hate leaving the boys when I have too. We get to the hospital and I see them preparing him for surgery. I haven’t cried yet, I was doing great, till the doctor walked in and told me to prepare, his lungs are so underdeveloped he may not be able to take the surgery. Right then and their I lost it! I had to be strong for my boy,but the tears kept flowing. He needed the surgery,cos nothing was changing for him. I couldn’t watch them take him to surgery so I sat in the waiting room for two hours and waited until the surgeon came in. He told me, he made it but it was trickier this time. He told me that his lungs re so underdeveloped he doesn’t even know if the surgery will help him. My boys made it! I see how strong my boys are. They are fighters!
4/18/13 Morning Visit
We visited our boys today. Noah is still on the oscillator. I’m hoping he will be back on the regular vent soon. They took him off his pain medication and he seemed very agitated today. His oxygen has been in the high 40′s. They did start to wean his vent settings slowly so that’s a good sign. Nathan’s oxygen was up to 98% in the early morning, but due to surgery he has to stay on his back and he seems to oxygenate better on his stomach.He loves his stomach! So he is still recovering and was also agitated. They decided to change his tube and put a bigger one in and that seems to be helping. We called this evening to check up on them, and his oxygen was down in the 40′s. Its been an okay day!
4/19/13 Good news Friday, I’ll take that :)
Here’s to another update. Boys are stable today. Noah is still on the oscillator, but the doctor said he’s recovering nicely and staying in the 30′s 40′s oxygen. Hoping he’s back on the other vent soon. He is now eating 15ml every 3hrs and they said over the phone that his pic line should be coming out soon and something else. ( I could have heard wrong though) They are weaning his vent setting and his lipids and his steroids. Noah is also is having another blood transfusion due to all his labs he’s been having lately.
Nathan is stable and recovering slowly from his surgery. Nathan pulled his chest tube out; I guess he wanted to be placed on his stomach asap! lol. Doctors are just going to leave him be today so he can rest!
Nathan is stable and recovering slowly from his surgery. Nathan pulled his chest tube out; I guess he wanted to be placed on his stomach asap! lol. Doctors are just going to leave him be today so he can rest!
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